Sunday, July 14, 2013

going to sleep, new roll, $743

64 comments:

  1. Tony, Samo from RTP has the following suggestion, for the attention of Jennifer Gay. Can you please publish it on your blog so she can see his suggestions:

    Jennifer - For your food you wish to donate, I suggest Catholic Charities Homeless Program (it's secular):
    1511 Las Vegas Blvd N Las Vegas, NV 89101
    (702) 385-3351

    Specify when you drop it off that you want it specifically to go to the Homeless program, and put a note on the bags specifying that as well.
    They have different (competing) programs. They have a large homeless shelter, and they set some of them up eventually in apartments.

    http://www.catholiccharities.com/rsd...lservices.html

    (I see they also have a food drive for a community pantry:
    http://www.catholiccharities.com/fooddrives.html - but I would only have it go there if the homeless program can't use it.
    And I'd think the homeless program can use food - they can donate it directly to the people in the apartments next to the campus.)

    An incredible guy runs the homeless program - Phillip Hollum (sp - ? info is on my other computer - will correct later today if misspelled - I'll leave some phone #'s here also).

    2nd from the right in this photo:



    Found this on their Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Catho...da/85125746703

    The smile is not just for the photo. The guy is one of the most positive people I've ever met in my life.


    I've donated tons of casino booty here.
    I recommend it as a charity donation for anyone with stuff for the homeless.


    They also have Thrift Shops around town, where I donate items inappropriate for the homeless.

    Donating clothes, casino T-shirts, sweatshirts, hats, etc. to the homeless program - it goes directly to the homeless for their immediate use.
    And Hollum is a great guy.

    If you want to be positive it goes to the Homeless program, you could ask to bring it in to Hollum if you get there in the 9am - 5pm ish time period, or call him and arrange to meet him to give it directly to him, which is what I've done in the past - I like to make sure the homeless guys can make immediate use of the stuff, instead of it getting shunted off to the thrift shops or other programs).

    Incidentally, I despise the Catholic Church and religion in general.
    I should make clear again that the homeless program is secular even though it's under the auspices of Catholic Charities of Southern Nevada - unlike the Salvation Army, the religious Mission, etc., which force the homeless staying at those places to hear a sermon before getting fed. That is not the case here.
    Here's some specifics.

    I'd like to suggest that everyone reading this who's in Vegas cut and paste, in case you have things now or in the future which you would like to go directly and immediately to homeless people (almost exclusively male but not 100%).


    Plaza Services
    Phillip Hollon
    SPHR, Vice President
    Director
    Residential Services Division
    387-2255
    (Office) 387-2256
    phollon@catholiccharities.com


    The guy on the far left of the photo is:

    Maurice Page - Director of Residential Services
    366-2085
    mpage@catholiccharities.com

    I've never dealt with him directly but was introduced to him by Phillip the last time I donated, as someone who could also accept my donations and make sure they go to the Homeless program.

    I used to give stuff for women and children to Shade Tree which is a bit farther north on LV Blvd., but Phillip told me that he has programs and services for some women as well and it sounded like his program could use the donations.
    I had some stuff good for kids from different casino promos, and he said they can give them to kids at Easter I think and definitely at the winter holidays, maybe all year long - they'll store it till they can give it away.

    Also, Catholic Charities or at least his Homeless/Residential programs takes out a tiny percent of donations towards admin/employee costs, whereas I found out that Shade Tree takes out a very large amount to pay the people in charge (possibly they've improved - this was as of a few years ago).

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    1. Thanks, Clint. Good info.

      Three Square is also a great option for food donations:

      http://www.threesquare.org/


      s.i.

      Delete
  2. Well, your plan to be 100% busto is working. Congrats.

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  3. "You obviously have a wonderful economy with words, Tony. I look forward to your next syllable with great eagerness."

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    1. that was intended to be a comment on the old blog, updating my status, but i accidently posted a new blog entry instead, half asleep not paying attention to what i was doing

      Delete
  4. Thank you for the information on Catholic Charities. I ended up giving a lot of our food to the neighbor with small kids. She's living in an extended stay.. Things can't be that great.

    I still have a lot of household items and clothing I simply do not want to ship home. They aren't terribly expensive goods, but I will donate them none the less. I appreciate the guidance. I have no issue with any religious affiliation, so long as they're helping those who need assistance.

    Tony here is beyond help. He'll die on the streets, penniless, because he refused all of us. It'll be sad too. There was a time when things really looked positive for him.

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  5. u were NOT really serious about trying to help me, u just wanted the GOVT to help me so u wouldnt have to. u wanted SI to help me with getting to places so u wouldnt have to, so u set unrealistic demands that he didnt because he did want me to get some form of help. had u really been serious u wouldve have responded to the text i sent a few weeks back letting u know my new cell phone that u totally ignored. anytime u wanted to reach me and ask a question, u had a chance to, but didnt. someone who really cared wouldve kept calling me til they got thru to talk. at least thats what u said i would do if i really wanted to talk to them agencies. u dont seem to practice what u preach. am still waiting to hear back from SI too. theres no chance in hell im going over to that place on charleston (vince drove me by it in the middle of the night to see where it was) without having a friend there with me to help speak for me because i wont know what to say to them and what to ask. without his help i wouldnt known what to say to the attorny. we all know that had not SI went to WA for a couple weeks id already been over there by now.

    within 1-2 days i think ill have no phone service, no way to contact any of u, Josie, SI, lightning cooldave, KOD, or even Vince. my roll keeps getting shorter, and it shouldnt because ive done the right things by staying off the machines and only playing poker. also my eyes keep getting harder and harder to see without the glasses. i wish i could return to ks and stay there for a few months, but im not going if mom would only let me for 1-2 weeks. if i had a way to play online there and make money without having to give mom any money for rent or food, id go just to get away for a while. i am worried about my scalp and if it wasnt like a 6-8 hour wait to see a dr there because of all the non emergency needs of so many other homeless people in the ER everyday, id go and try to make sure my scalp isnt infected. my ear still feels stopped a lot in the morning, and my face feels swollen at times in the jaw. and hot a lot. but i dont want to be put in there for 10 days again with an IV to clear out infections if i need it because i wont have internet there this time.

    if u look at this thread on RTP, u will see that no one believed ur other post. http://www.roughingthepunter.com/showthread.php?t=3005&page=885 start on page 885 and then look at the following pages

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    1. You're so addicted to gambling that you won't even seek medical attention unless you are sure that you have access to gambling at your fingertips.

      But by all means, keep listening to those delusional enablers who tell you that you can gamble your way to a better life. I'm sure things will turn around any minute now.

      Delete
    2. If you have an infection that goes untreated, it will eventually kill you. That will show all those people out there who refused to force you to help yourself!!!!

      Delete
  6. yeah the plan for me to stick to poker only and stay off the machines wouldve been a perfectly sound and solid plan all last year, back when my roll was high enough to afford my own housing, and to play high enough limits to beat the rake. everyone i see at the tables is still telling me that i play really good, and dont play garbage hands. and no one seems to understand why im losing thats actually been with me when i play. u see, im following that plan now, but im still in a terrible bind. thats why i say ONLY money can really help me, and of course free housing also. but certainly not with strangers like the govt agencies provide. free housing with those i know and trust. im too afraid of other people for them options to be realistic. certainly way too afraid of going to a homeless shelter, those are in terrible neighborhoods to be waiting in a line outside at night. or to even walk to. and u sure cant leave ur belongings there without them being stolen. so how is that a valid option? and sure they might be able to get some clients into their own housing, but not immediate. thats way down the road, probably after they get their ssi. im about the only person who dont have a friend they can move in with. i am not scared at all of living with others i know. only those i dont know. if i lived with others i did know id actually be a lot safer from burglaries and robberies. never understood why any of the readers cannot understand this.

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    1. The size of your bankroll isn't the reason you aren't winning at poker.

      It's your lack of game selection.
      It's your lack of awareness at the table.
      It's your lack of skill.

      Delete
    2. this is 100% not true. no one, no matter how good, can win with the size of bankroll i have. thats why no one else but me is willing to make an attempt to start off with so little. i only do because i dont see any other alternatives. if u sat in a game and watched me, or took the word of lightning and cooldave, u would know. those people have actually played a lot with me.

      and how do u game select when u arent playing $1-2 NL, (which means only 1 or none of ur table is going)? the only game u have multiple choices of tables at is $1-2 NL. play any other game, and theres only 1 table going. at least i chose the casino with the weakest players and the best action. uve never played at the suncoast so what would u know? listen to those who play there. the games certainly are much weaker there than the V or the orleans. but they still arent as weak as the commerce, or some of the other places in northern cali. i dont know yet about san diego area since ive not yet visited.

      u dont beat the microstakes by being aware. u beat the microstakes by being TIGHT. the games where the players are more skilled and not chasing ($1-2 NL and higher) thats where u beat them by paying close attention to others tells. the lowest stakes games u win at by playing less hands than everyone else. but what would u know? u only play the highest of stakes and the skills u need to beat those arent the skills i need to beat the games i play.

      sure i lack the skill to play the games u are playing in and good at. and 100x more so u lack the skill for the games i am playing in and good at.

      the issue IS the low bankroll, because it keeps making me play games with a higher and higher rake percentage. (the difference between $2-4 $4-8 and $8-16 (v has lots of $8-16 omaha if i had the roll) those games are too loose also, but getting more nitty than $4-8

      Delete
    3. A job would be an alternative ...

      Delete
    4. A week ago I had no bankroll.
      I borrowed $200 from my life-roll and played some poker.

      Today I over $500 that I have won....
      I'm not sure what this "No one, no matter how good, can win with the size bankroll I have" nonsense is.

      Delete
    5. Tony, have u ever heard of Archie Karas?

      Delete
  7. Tony take your last $700 and buy a one way ticket to Lyons Kansas, go stay with your mother and son till you get back on your feet. Do the rite thing Tony, no one wants to see you homeless.

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    1. and once the money is gone zin, and i cant afford to pay mom rent no more and she gets tired of me being there then what? also id be bored stiff there, i need a way to make some money. would be better off living in ur trailer, at least u could help me find a means of income.

      Delete
    2. If you're bored - GET A JOB.
      Find a Hobby.
      Gambling is not the only thing in the world.
      You sound like my seven year old son.
      We go to the drive in to watch a movie but have to wait for it to be dark enough for them to play the movie.
      "What am I supposed to do? I'm bored"

      Delete
    3. Tony definitely has the emotional maturity of a seven year old child.

      Delete
  8. if i went to the mental health intake service centers others here suggest i go, and they actually referred me to a shelter offering housing, (thats ALL they do anyway-refer people to the mission or salvation army-certainly not give them housing themselves, except as a psychiatric inpatient in the state hospital.) But if by chance they did get me into a free place to live, in a private room, then JG and the others who troll me on RTP would just say that that agency was an "enabler" because now i wouldnt have to spend my own money on shelter (and could use it to play poker). if i got food stamps, they would call foodstamps an enabler, because then instead of using money on food, i could use it to play poker. if i got the SSI, they would call SSI an enabler. if i got free medical care for my scalp or anything else, they would call that agency an enabler for allowing me to spend money on playing poker that might otherwise be needed on emergency medical care at some point. or if i got a free prescription for medicine. the truth is once people start using that logic, almost anything can be called an enabler. a mission providing the homeless with a bed is sometimes called that by allowing those who are homeless to stay alive and try to save their money instead of having to spend it.

    u see, what people really want is for me to have $0 in my pockets at all times to control me so i cannot ever play poker. as much as they deny it or dont realize it, thats how i see it. and is why i cannot give in. thats why people say, oh u have $700, u can afford to get housing. u can afford to pay ur cell phone bill. u can afford to pay ur internet u can afford a haircut. u can afford bus fare and food, and to see a dr. not even realizing all those things cost much much more than the $743 i have left. no one really wants me to become financially independent with the money to take care of myself on my own without going anywhere for help. people used to think not going anywhere for help was a sign of pride. if they wanted to see me become independent, theyd find a friend i could stay with, or a place with a very small rent, such as $75 a week or a friend i could give that too. and theyd also find me a source of income instead. i had a good source of income already at poker, and i can still do just as well as i always did and better even as long as i stuck to just poker, which ive proved now i can do by avoiding machines almost all of the last 2-3 weeks. (only playing once). which would be true if i had enough to work with. and i think as little as $2000 would be enough for omaha, and $3000 for $1-2 NL. i just got to avoid 4 handed games like the plague and i wont ever have another $400 loss. also i dont have enough for $4-8 $1 ante hilow stud, so ill avoid that too now. u see that was the cause of last nights $200 loss at the suncoast. another good player (in fact 2 who play for a living) a couple of older guys who only played a short time, were telling me a big reason why i wasnt running well was because the ante is way too much in that game. i must of just been lucky when playing with dave.

    yeah i feel like people want to make me give up my dream of making my living at poker, and i see no valid reason to do that. maybe i should put it on hold temporarily but certainly not give it up, thats something different entirely. the only reason its not working so well now, is i dont have enough to work with, and the next time i do have enough to work with, things will go 100x better since i now know all the mistakes i made and how to make the needed changes for success.

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    1. You've lost $1,000 in the past week playing just poker. How exactly does that translate into "a good source of income"?

      You've lost 5 figures in the past 2 years gambling.

      You will NEVER be financially independent as long as you gamble.

      Delete
    2. gl cya at the soup kitchen.also u dont have a bankroll. u have a stake. yr bankroll is different than money u need to buy food,pay rent,etc. i just hope u have enuff money so i can get some of it .when i come and play downtown in august. tc

      Delete
  9. Oh, and it isn't the people giving you cash out of pity that are the enablers. It's the people convincing you that you are a profitable gambler or can be a profitable gambler with a few small "tweaks". They're the enablers.

    You have nearly none of the qualities that I would associate with a successful professional gambler.

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  10. I don't even know what a "roughing the punter" is, much less troll you on there. I am an employed, 33 year old massively pregnant woman with a family, a cat, a job, a monthly print media poker column and barely enough time to squeak in a hobby or two. My ONLY dog in this fight is that I, for some lame sentimental reason, want you to get help. I partially blame my industry for the sickness in yor brain. You honestly can't help your level of bat shit crazy. I suppose I just want to see you beat the tragically unhappy ending you're headed for.

    And yes, all of the things I'd said I'd intended to give you or do for you were real. It cost me multiple arguments in my own home. I made the initial offer to shuttle you around, without even thinking to ask Steven if it was okay. I don't typically ask his permission, and am not expected to. But when I entertained the idea of letting you stay with us this summer, I told him who you were and your story. He read a bit of the blog, spoke to some dealers who know you and absolutely flipped out on me for even being this involved. Seems he doesn't think the mother of his child, who is already dealing with some health issues, should be anywhere near an infection laden autistic with addiction problems who is desperate, hanging by a thread and prone to violent outbursts. And he's right. Though I don't consider you dangerous, you're definitely not stable. We compromised and agreed that if you were at least attempting to get help, or under the care of a doctor that you could stay in our condo for the 16 days remaining on the lease (we had a three month group rate through the WSOP but can't stay that long), and leave you any food we were unable to consume. Which ended up being a lot.. I am too tired to cook any more. :(

    He wouldn't tolerate the idea of giving you cash, or even a pretend stake.. Or me being alone in a vehicle with you. And I respect him. He loves me and the son I'm carrying and he not nearly as interested in your survival as I feel compelled to be.

    I'm done with it all now anyway. Steven has been selected to deal down to the final table of the main, and I'm going to go sit near the stage at the rio and snap some photos. Tuesday morning, I leave Vegas and all of this behind. Any one at the Rio tonight, feel free to say Hi. I'll be the chick slightly smaller than a four bedroom house near the stage. :)

    Best of luck to you TBC. You're pretty much a lost cause, but maybe.. Just maybe.. Something will force you to get help. That heat in your jaw? Possibly an access. Google it and see how deadly it can be untreated. Take care.

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  11. About this scalp thing... Do you bother to shower and wash your hair EVERY day? With shampoo? Just curious...

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  12. I just went to RTP! Lovely forum. I will register when I get home.

    I should clarify.. This was NOT my apartment I was giving Tony. I'm not an idiot. It was simply unit F1073 at the budget suites on Tropicana. A one bedroom condo with full kitchen. There is no security deposit, no credit card on file. We just bought a dealer package from may 1st to August 1st because it was cheaper than week to week. There is nothing in that unit that could be destroyed or sold, the tv is from 1985 at best and though I never actually saw a flea.. CatCat is suitably happier now that we've moved out.

    It wasn't a terribly generous offer. The bed was the worst I'd ever slept on and we spent $125 on memory foams to make it tolerable. It's better than homeless though. I'm spending my last two nights in a comped suite at the Orleans because I want to soak in a deep tub.

    And the food our kitchen was stocked with was nothing fancy. Some noodles, maybe five pounds of lean ground beef. A frozen pizza. Oranges. A dozen eggs. A third of a gallon of milk. Just stuff we couldn't consume before the craziness of the main event began.

    No there was no cash involved, but I'm 90% sure the woman in 2073 is a hooker. Either that or she's very popular.

    I apologize if what I said sounded too good to be true. I was simply offering him a handout. He seems to like those.

    And I never received a text from Tony either. Or an email, or a message on Facebook. Not this summer, at all.

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    1. text was sent June 21 at 7.23pm with the words, not sure u still have my cell. this was sent right after the intial offer a long time ago. since no response was ever given to this text. i knew she clearly was not interested in talking to me, so i never sent another one. proof of me sending this text to her can be seen by anyone in vegas, and ill show it to SI tonight.

      Delete
    2. after being worried she might not have my new phone and only the old one i had last WSOP, i wanted to talk and ask about the offer, and got very upset she had no interest in sending a text back or explaining what i was supposed to do in the initial offer. i knew i could not do all of it to get any help at all and could only do it a little at a time, but i kept thinking surely she will try to call sooner or later since i wanted to make sure she knew my number. someone got that text, why didnt they respond?

      Delete
    3. Do you ever respond to texts from random numbers that don't identify themselves?

      Yeah, me neither. One text message definitely showed just how important it was to you.

      Delete
    4. yes i respond all the time to texts i always keep bugging them trying to find out who they are, and call back. i cant understand why anyone else wouldnt do the same. it was clearly obvious it was me sending it, who else would be sending that text? surely shes not that dumb. had i thought she might not know it was me, id have sent more texts. i think people just pretend they dont know its me to be a dick. others have before too, and it makes me mad.

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    5. Tony, I just saw the "text" you're rambling about. It is from an unknown number and all it says is "not sure if you still have my cell". Along with every other creepy or vague text I got that day/week/month.. It went ignored.

      Do you remember how you got my number? I never gave it to you. You got it off Facebook. Where it's posted, publicly. So do plenty of other people. It's public, because I work and write for the poker industry. I keep my information accessible so I can be reached with a good story or job opportunity. This results in a lot of phone calls and texts I never respond. If you want a response from me or anyone, identify yourself, text what you want and ask specific questions. I had no idea who that text was from, and even if I had known.. I might not have responded. I don't want to chit chat with you or talk about the weather. I was interested in helping you accomplish specific tasks.

      It is not my responsibility, or that of anyone else's, to babysit you or track you down or pester you. Do something proactive before you end up dead on the streets. Or don't. The people who care are dwindling daily.

      Delete
  13. One more clarification I need to make after reading RTP. I forwarded the blog, via email, to the poker floor people I know in CA and other locations NOT out of meanness, not as a public health concern (casinos are full of disease), but for one reason only: Tony's own good. I realize that I'm in the minority in think he needs help and that the casinos are endangering his life. He has a serious gambling problem. Anyone who has ever worked in a casino knows that we're all coached on problem gambling and the mental illness aspect as well. Tony is far better off NOT in the casinos, but instead decieving assistance, medical help and some much needed stability.

    Granted, this is just my opinion. But any responsible floor manager or supervisor would not want him in their room, or continue to feed the monkey on his back. It isn't in his best interest or the best interest of the poker room at this point.

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    1. actually about 90% of the customers play with money that would better be spent on their bills. not just me. most to a far bigger degree than me, not only spending their own money, but by borrowing heavily and being deeply in debt besides, i wont i have no way to get credit. most dont leave til they have absolutely $0. and if its a casino im never at, they wont even know who i am if i walk in because it will be someone complete different seating people than the guy who read this. also a ton of what he would read would be the stories about me that arent true, so its fraud

      Delete
    2. I have gambled in public casinos for many years, and I have seen all sorts of problem gamblers of all types and sizes, from the small micro grinders trying to make it to the big time, to the big earners who lost a ton the same night they won a lot of money (many times enough so they didn't have the buyin for the next day's tournament---the difference is people have deep respect for their game and they have a history of making big amounts of money--thousands in one night, tens of thousands even). A few I know had to quit because they were just too much of an addict.

      I have to say, since I enjoy gambling and have made money at it, I am loath to tell people they badly need to stop. Tony is one of the clearest cases I have ever seen. He should never gamble in any form again. He just can not handle it. He is bubbling sick with addiction. I am hardly the only person who thinks so. Besides many followers who have come to the conclusion Tony needs to move away from his gambling problem, you can also see the number of fellow gamblers at a site like 2+2 who tell Tony he needs help and give out the Gamblers Anonymous number whenever he posts one of his 'blog type' life stories.

      I know plenty of Pros...Tony will never make enough gambling to survive just on his earnings. He just has too many leaks to mention in every area where money just flies out of the cracks. He already slowly threw away (on gambling) his life-saving SSI giveaway a few years ago, that would have kept him in housing and food the rest of his life--only to be back in the exact same condition he was in prior to his Mom getting it for him.

      So he gave away a lifetime gig, for 5 years of non-stop gambling. I mean, the only out is to start over and realize your dream is just a pipe-dream. I have said this forever---Professional Gambling is an extremely tough way to make it in life. Autism, anger problems, skill inadequacy, bankroll leaks, just make it that much more impossible to live that life of lazy gambling dream (by the way, most successful gamblers are hardly lazy).

      What Tony does not realize if he would completely give up this gambling disease he has, he would likely have more money then he could ever dream of while playing poker, VBJ, whatever.

      It would be a great story if he could overcome all these severe roadblocks and became some type of player that people followed because he was actually respected at playing poker, then followed due to pity, charity, comedy or train-wreck potential.

      If Tony could control his addiction he might be able to recreationally play poker, but it is so clear he has no capacity to control it in any matter (at least not for any type of long-term period -- yeah one day, one week, even one month is not proper control or a large advancement).

      Tony has more friends than he deserves, and more opportunities than likely any other homeless person, but sometimes no matter what you try to do for these people on an individual basis they can not take the help and they are destined to fall back to the streets. That is why many professionals advise NOT to try and help addicted/homeless individuals in this way, and to just give to the organizations that know how to properly care for these poor sick people (I could list hundreds of links that profess this from Professionals who help the addicted and homeless).

      Many people who follow Tony are now seeing the light, and starting to do the right thing by refusing help until he seeks help on his own for his problems. Many talk about Freedom. Well, Tony is free to live on the streets instead of seek help for his problems if that is his wish. He has many more options than almost anyone in his similar situation and all he wants to do is throw it in the garbage, just like he did to the help his mother gave him about 5 years ago.

      Delete
    3. I do not think you are in the minority. I agree with you 100%. In fact I would like to see someone post who doesn't agree with this.

      Delete
  14. Tony have you ever tried working an honest job?

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  15. even though I wish Tony the best, stop giving and trying to help Tony out with suggestions. He is going to do it his way and will continue to refuse help unless you give him a stake or gambling money

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  16. Um, you're running out of time to "make it" in playing poker. If you haven't made it yet, it's probably not going to happen. People who make it, either grind their way up or they take shots with a smaller bankroll. And if they to broke, they get a job or two or three and save money any way they can to take more shots. You don't seem to be doing either method.

    Can you tell us what your plan is to "make it". Help us to understand.

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  17. So...what's the plan, Tony?

    s.i.

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    1. And now, the end is here
      And so I face the final curtain
      My friend, I'll say it clear
      I'll state my case, of which I'm certain
      I've lived a life that's full
      I traveled each and ev'ry highway
      And more, much more than this, I did it my way

      Delete
  18. Without too many words - Tony, this path will lead to your death in the gutters. This is completely true and accurate. Seek help now, call a crisis hotline and tell them you're going to commit suicide - at least then you'll get committed and get some free housing and food until your mental health is better. You are heading down a path to death.

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  19. I remember when Tony had a 3k bankroll and I told him to play poker and stay off the machines. He told me nl 200 was to high variance, so he kept playing slot machines.

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  20. Tony has made it perfectly clear that unless you give him straight up cash or direct assistance you can go fuck yourself, as you "don't understand".

    Well what I understand is, you have turned down jobs for no reason, you have turned down help for no reason, and you are now calling someone who offered to help you massively a liar. All the excuses about location, people, etc are now mute, you have no option.
    By the way, govt assistance is not enabling, its assistance, plain and simple. Once you don't need it, it goes away, simple. But you will always need it as you have no concept of making money. Your 20 or so years on the breadline you think is success.
    And before you start the old "you don't know what it's like" routine, I do, and there is only one way out. Get a fucking job. Not one with gambling availability, or no blacks, dogs, irish. or one that pays you 3k a month take home to do fuck all. Just any fucking job.
    This respect you crave, comes from doing things for yourself, not being a tool with everyone you encounter. Also if you are paying in tax, its not so bad to take it back in benefit.

    The road of excuses is over.
    The road of handouts is over.
    Unless you find the junction soon the road itself is over.

    Way to go.

    I have followed this saga for long enough.

    By the way. Things you could of done to make easy money: Compile a book of all blog posts and key "high" points of the last 5 years. Believe it or not people love this stuff, and it makes big money, see the "Bob Servant Diaries". Oh but you delete blogs all the time, so that's that record gone.
    How about using adsense, oh you did but blew up at them as well to make sure you cannot use that $100+ a month.

    ReplyDelete
  21. turned a one time $95 win into a $26 win, and of course, i stayed off the machines as usual. new roll $769

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As usual? You have stayed off machines for another 2-3 days and it's "as usual?"

      You are addicted Tony and only the little sock roll is preventing you from playing machines because you are too scared to lose it!

      Your only machine play block is to have so little money that you are scared to play them. Idiot.

      You will blow whatever money you accumulate because once again you just dont know what the fuck you are doing when it comes to money and/or supporting yourself.

      You are an epic failure at life Tony.

      Delete
  22. Replies
    1. its been said the average person, once unemployed, takes 6-8 months to find a new job

      Delete
    2. In this regard, Tony, you are exceptional.

      Kudos.

      s.i.

      Delete
    3. You've taken 25 years. Kudos.

      Delete
  23. Tony:

    Were you able to make the mental health mtg today? Were you able to get to the hospital?

    s.i.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i made it to mountain view hospital and they looked at my scalp, they didnt think it was infected, but im wondering if they just said that to get me out of there knowing im honeless. and they might been pissed i used their hospital instead of UMC

      Delete
    2. Tony:

      Don't be silly. The hospital isn't going to misdiagnose you out of anger and spite because you're homeless.

      They're going to misdiagnose you out of a sense of liberal-bias/ethnic-solidarity with Travon Martin because you're a republican.

      Intellectual curiosity is a healthy thing. Raging paranoia is not.

      s.i.

      Delete
    3. Did the hospital suggest you wash your hair daily or recommend using a medicated shampoo?

      Delete
    4. Selenium Sulfide is one of the active ingredients in medicated shampoo.

      My company owns the hospital Tony went to. I could look up his medical records, but that would be illegal so I won't do it.

      Delete
    5. would u learn anything that i wouldnt know that they dont tell me?

      Delete
  24. Unlike you they have a duty to not lie, so they are probably right.

    What about the mental health meeting ?

    ReplyDelete
  25. Longtime reader here, first, and only, time posting. I'd like to preface my comments below by stating that nothing of what follows is intended at all to be insulting. I only wish to sincerely introduce some, in my opinion, objective poker reality into the conversation.

    In one of the comments above, Tony makes the following statement: "i just got to avoid 4 handed games like the plague and i wont ever have another $400 loss."

    This statement, alone, as far as I am concerned, is a perfect illustration of why Tony should not be deluding himself that he can make it as a poker professional. It shows such a complete and fundamental lack of comprehension of one of the most basic of poker realities (variance), as to render any "dream" of succeeding as a poker pro unattainable. Tony, if after 20 years of playing poker you STILL don't realize that it is, in fact, quite possible to lose 2 full buy-ins in 1/2 NLHE ($400) in a matter of minutes (in consecutive hands, for that matter) EVEN while playing perfectly solid poker and getting your money in with the best hand and being the big favorite, you quite simply have NO CHANCE WHATSOEVER to make a living playing poker. Again, I don't mean this to be an insult, just a reality check.

    I've also played against Tony numerous times on Seals when he was still playing the PLO8 tourneys and ring games there. I believe Tony professes this to be one of his best games, but I witnessed him numerous times chasing low draws post flop in heads up situations with no viable high. I'm just a marginally winning recreational player, but even I could see that this kind of fundamentally -EV play doesn't bode well for his prospects as a poker pro.

    Just as a fellow human being, Tony, and as someone who has enjoyed reading your story, I urge you to please have the courage to find a new path in life before it's too late. It doesn't matter how big or small your roll is or whatever the other thousand or so rationalizations you might come up with are, based on the evidence I've presented above, your chances of making a decent living playing poker are slim to nil.

    In closing, rather than wish you "good luck", I wish you "good decisions".

    ReplyDelete
  26. all i know is i wasted about $20k a year in machines, so thats about $80-100k that was won at poker, so yeah i know i used to be a winning player anyway. not every year, i mean in the 90s i seldom touched a machine, and some years i lived at home, but in vegas i touched them a lot in the last several years. and that money was lost over many hours in omaha (the $400) not at no limit. im well aware losing $400 is NOTHING in $1-2 no limit. most of my readers arent though, they think if i lose that at NL, id have to be horrible at the game. it just seemed like a lot to lose at omaha8, never in my life have i lost that at omaha8 and i know its due to playing short and running bad, because i always run bad at shorthanded. or at least it feels that way. i dont know how u misintrepreted that to think i meant NL.

    i dont remember chasing lows HU on seals. i always had high draws if HU, even if u didnt see the high potential. or it all went in on the flop before it was HU. i know i won most of the time on seals in the omaha8. maybe i had the low already made.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I just used 1/2 NLHE as an example, probably because you included it in the sentence preceding the statement about never losing $400 again:

      "which would be true if i had enough to work with. and i think as little as $2000 would be enough for omaha, and $3000 for $1-2 NL. i just got to avoid 4 handed games like the plague and i wont ever have another $400 loss."

      But my reasoning is still correct, even if it were solely Omaha8 you were talking about. There is no magical way to play Omaha8 that will prevent you from EVER having a $400 loss. It's just a deluded way of thinking. If you play Omaha8 regularly enough, you will, with almost mathematical certainty, suffer $400 losses on some days due to variance. Again, the fact that you can't seem to grasp this concept is, unfortunately, a serious indictment of your poker abilities.

      As far as the hands on Seals go, I don't have time to dig up the hand histories, but I know what I saw. I don't think you were a bad player, but I definitely witnessed some seriously -EV calls.

      Anyhow, I've said my peace. I sincerely wish you a happy, healthy, and prosperous future.

      Delete