Monday, July 29, 2013

Paranoia is destroying my mind, and my relationships

i don't know whether i should call today a "good" day or a bad "day", but i am upset about one thing, i no longer think this $1-3 stud hilow game is beatable. having 50c a hand taken from antes and the antes dropped if it reaches 4th street is just too much, because its $3+1 max and thats no matter how small the pot is as long as it gets to 4th street.

u see, this is the 2nd time in a week ive been in on the BBJ. the first time it was a players share of $80. today it was the BIG end, for $267, when i lost 6432A to a wheel. the jackpot never gets very big in stud. and yet i arrived at the casino with a roll of only $636, and left the casino with a roll of $733, and i wont have that when i leave here cause im sitting at Dennys 24 hour eatery so i can use my laptop. Killing time on seals with clubs with about 240 chips there, worth about $21, and no that isnt part of my roll.

How does someone win $267 in a BBJ, and yet leave the casino winning a bit less than $100 in profit? i am now seriously of the opinion thats too heavily raked and anted. the people who have actually played stud8 with me, such as cooldave, know i beat the game overall. Same game i used to play on pokerstars and party poker years ago in Montana. and i still see plenty of bad play with hands i would NEVER consider staying in with on 3rd, such as 2 lows and a face card.

u see, $90+ an hour is coming off the table, plus the jackpot $1. and they take $1 more at $30 for the jackpot, didnt realize that was legal, thought cali didnt allow it to be based on pot size at all. $90 an hour is A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT for a $1-3 hilow limit game. anyone who claims the opponents are better than me really dont understand math very well either. its the rake. using Frosty stink Mitts logic, the $2-4 fixed limit game (against the weakest opponents) would be more beatable per hour than a normal $1-2 NL game. Since he claims its not the rake, but the difference between u and ur opponents. anyone knows this argument falls flat on its face.

so the real issue, if the game isnt beatable, then what the hell do i play and where? yeah id be better off outside cali, but its nice and cool here at night compared to vegas (in the 60s mostly) and anywhere else wouldve cost more to travel to. Plus theres smaller stakes games, that Phoenix and FL dont offer to my knowledge. i dont have the money to play normal games and stakes, and i feel ive been overly lucky in the $20 NL to beat that rake. and i keep feeling like i cannot afford $40 NL even though i currently have 18 buyins. im still not wanting to spend ANY of the money for gambling, (or for living expenses) what i want to do is lock up the money in a hole in the ground and just panhandle all day long til the roll gets back over $1000. i know that would be the "responsible" thing to do, but it sure wouldnt be very enjoyable, so i cannot discipline myself enough to do it.

another thing, i keep thinking the dealers are cheating me. why? because they think im not going to tip (even though i gave out a $7 tip today) and that dealer was actually glad to see me win it, cause she knew how much i needed the money--we talked after the game the day before. alot of dealers are
like JG, without a Christian bone in their body, and only concerned about their own financial needs and no one elses. And stud is the easiest game for a dealer to cheat in, especially the old time dealers whove dealt for years in underground games. its so easy to fix it so someone gets nothing but bricks when its obv they are going low. easy to hold out a face card and make sure they get it, or to make all ur low cards go to the player next to u, who keeps hitting them like crazy. Even JG, she told me the dealers will be trying to fix it so i dont win because i cant afford to tip every hand. so why shouldnt i be paranoid? the odds are too remote for me to get so many bricks day after day by pure chance. i even lost rolled up 888 to 1 opponent who starts with Kc and 2 more clubs, who backdoors a low and a flush.

so its very easy for me to sit there angry all day. angry because the dealers are too dumb to realize im one of the better tippers when im not broke. this is evidenced by all the times i gave $5 instead of $1 when my roll was riding high. i specifically did that so one day when i went broke, they wouldve already been  prepayed ahead of time. even AKgal (a dealer) told me before my tip was quite generous up in OR 1 day years ago when i won a tourny for about $900 and gave about 10%. if i am winning good i always take care of the dealers, but i sure dont feel much like it when im losing my fucking ass, and i feel like its no ones business anyway.

we all know that when i have money i give it away to everyone, way too much of it in fact, thats been my downfall in the past. it has a lot to do with why im in such pitiful shape now, (i never put my needs first). Only my wants. JG knows i offered a woman a place to live free and clear, no strings as to what the other person had to do and whether they gambled or not. if i was rich everyone would be happy with me, as much as i would do to raise money for those i feel i could relate to who function like me (wanting to rely strictly on gambling at poker but underrolled). and that has a lot to do with why i see nothing wrong in getting the same in return from others.

yeah dealers would make a lot more than a flat $1 a hand if everyone used my system for tipping. NOTHING on rolls of under $2000, $1 a pot up to $3000, $2 a pot up to $5000, $3 a pot up to $10,000 and $5 a pot on any roll thats higher. that way the rich pay their fare share. and there are so many players with a roll that high they would come out far better off.

a wise man once said "from everyone according to his ability, to everyone according to his need". thats the system Jesus used and one we should put into place today. Karl Marx had the right idea, but his hatred for God ruined everything and the lives of millions.

55 comments:

  1. You have this flawed logic that you're losing EITHER because the rake is too high OR because you aren't skilled, and since you know the rake is too high, then you must be skilled.

    The truth is, you're losing at poker because the rake is too high AND you aren't skilled. If you have a larger bankroll and move up in stakes you alleviate the former problem, but exacerbate the latter. Your lack of skill at poker is the elephant in the room that you refuse to acknowledge.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tony, dealers have bills to pay, food to buy, and hopefully retirement to plan for. If you can't afford to tip, then don't play until you CAN afford it. Otherwise, you are stealing the dealers' time and money. It's not the dealers' fault that you suck at life.

    If you want to play games that are structured so that they are beatable over the long haul, then you need to play in higher stakes games. So, put together a bigger bankroll to play in bigger games. This should not be a difficult concept to grasp.

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  3. Tony, you've made a very bold, accurate and enlightened statement. I'm talking about the title "Paranoia is destroying my mind...". THIS Tony. Your paranoia has hurt you in so many ways. In this post alone....

    Paranoia that the rake is too high, instead of focusing of what you have control over - your game. If a poker player is losing, a smart one looks for leaks in her game, not for excuses, yet you go on and on ad nauseum about the rake and I'm sure you think about it even more than you say. Focus on WHY you won $267 yet left with less than $100. It ain't the rake baby.

    Paranoia that dealers are cheating when they deal. Total paranoia. No one would risk their job like this. This is your imagination and yet another excuse for why you didn't win. It's paranoia Tony. I swear.

    Also, you should think about what you've said....'I never put my needs first, only my WANTS.' Change that shit pronto Tony!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am sure that this post will elicit many comments. Your unique way of looking at the world has a way of doing that.

    You want a bigger bankroll, but there is little chance of that happening at the level you are playing due to the low level, the rake, variance, and skill level.

    Your posts follow a familiar pattern -- "this game is beatable" followed by "this game is not beatable" sometime thereafter. It's beatable when you win, then not beatable when you lose.

    The panhandling idea is actually the closest you have come to seeing the light that using work as a bankroll builder would work. Most people would get some low paying job, work like hell, and eventually climb out of their situation -- what we used to cal "the American way." I guess most of us would see panhandling as a last last resort, one in which you give up a significant amount of dignity. You would rather do this than get a job.

    I think most of your readers would be terrified at the prospect of being homeless and would do almost anything to avoid it. Your bottom is likely so low compared to the bottom of most people. I can't even imagine.

    And as long as you mentioned giving money away to women, didn't you blow some of it giving it to women in exchange for sexy pictures or other things of a decidedly carnal nature? I don't recall Jesus advocating that. Not sure about Karl Marx, but maybe Groucho, Chico, Harpo, Zeppo and Gummo.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. leave Groucho out of this.
      Chico, however---- he seems the type!

      Delete
  5. Yes, totally agree. It was Marx's views on religion that doomed communism...

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  6. I am not sure who is the head of the Poker Players Alliance right now but Tony please contact him/her with your revolutionary tipping scheme so it can be globally implemented.....

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  7. What have god and your poker ability got in common?

    They both don't exist.

    ReplyDelete
  8. LOL @ Tony.

    ever watched Breaking Bad?

    Become a meth dealer.

    ReplyDelete
  9. "a wise man once said "from everyone according to his ability, to everyone according to his need". thats the system Jesus used and one we should put into place today."

    So Jeebus was a Communist? I'll be damned ... learn something new every day.

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  10. and just panhandle all day long til the roll gets back over $1000. i know that would be the "responsible" thing to do, but it sure wouldnt be very enjoyable, so i cannot discipline myself enough to do it.

    This is actually called having a job and pays better and is more respectable than aaking for handouts

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  11. it wasn't that long ago that you called government handouts immoral and against sin. and now you're quoting karl marx? tony what the fuck?

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  12. Are you going to use this same bankroll tipping system to stiff your Dennys server?

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  13. Tony Bigcharles, Marxist.

    Now I've heard everything.

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  14. Jennifer did not say that dealers are cheating to make you lose, she said they are secretly wishing you lose.

    Example the hand is down to you and a tipping reg, the dealer knows you don't tip and the reg does, of course they are wishing the reg wins so they get tipped. They are not fixing the deck tho.

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  15. Is the rake beatable can be filed under 30 buyins for NL and don't bet more than 1% at vbj and you will never go broke for inane stupid things you obsess over when you could instead be using that time to become a better player

    If your player pool is limited and their access to new income is limitrd, then the rake matters. But if you're playing in a casino where seats don't stay open for long, then it doesn't matter. Losing for 18 months and chalking it up to variance does though.

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  16. Tony:

    It was Louis Blanc who first uttered those words, not Marx. The fact that you would promote that belief, as well as the idea of progressive taxation (your idea of wealthier people having to tip more) really should give you pause to rethink your support of republican platforms.

    There is a ton to digest in your most recent post (why are you ripping on Jenn Gay as someone who is only concerned about her own financial interests and no one elses, when she was trying to offer YOU a lot of financial help? your paranoia about dealers risking their future employment to screw you out of a pot. your weird idea that dealers would/should be aware of how you've tipped other dealers at other casinos in the distant past...etc...), but the main point is that you simply don't have a large enough roll to be doing ANY gambling right now.

    Go somewhere and regroup. Get back on SSI. Await your back pay. Go back to Kansas and get healthy again. Your mom can help you make your appointments.

    You've slipped too far into the hole...it's dark in there.

    s.i.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Reading TBC's posts as of recent makes for a good argument for gambling to be illegal.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. dont let 1 rotten apple spoil it 4 everybody plz

      Delete
  18. Too bad my comment wont get posted because Tony is being a little child.

    JG told you that you did not have a Christian bone in your body and she was right.

    You dont like it so here you go throwing it back at her - you are a joke Tony.

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  19. Tony Bigcharles
    8 hours ago ·

    ..





    there would be so much more compassion, love and understanding in this more if more people would follow the economic teachings of Karl marx and Jesus Christ. i wouldnt have to live on the streets of san diego worried about being assualted or robbed while i sleep. discussed this in my blog today






    2Like · · Unfollow Post · Share · Promote.












    Sherry Bigcharles Karl Marx??? You have got to be joking! To put such an *EVIL* man with Jesus Christ is HORRIBLE ! Am confident you would not do such a thing if it were not for your disibility of understanding.

    6 hours ago · Like · 1..











    Sherry Bigcharles The teachings of Karl Marx have enslaved millions of people both economically and otherwise robbing them of their rightful freedoms.

    6 hours ago · Like · 1..











    Sherry Bigcharles they were pawns in the hands of an EVIL GOVERNMENT.

    6 hours ago · Like · 1..



    Sherry Bigcharles Also you are choosing to live that way WHEN YOU DO NOT HAVE TO. I have told you to come home time after time and you refuse. You have a friend who offered to give you a plane ticket home. So please don't say that you have to live like you are living







    Sherry Bigcharles You are loved by so many people. Some understand your disibility and some don't understand. But how can we help someone who refuses help?

    6 hours ago · Like · 1..











    Mike Romanos Well spoken Sherry,

    6 hours ago via mobile · Like..











    Mike Romanos :2 say that ur a baboon wud not b enuf...... what a coincidence...... I live on the streets of San Diego as well..... how come I don't have 2 worry about getting robbed or beaten in my sleep?.. cud it b that I stay mostly in 4 diamond hotels down here... how can I afford such a luxury?.... I can't..... but I get em comped by the casinos because I run so many coins in their slot machines every month.... how can I do this? Because I beat those machines on a daily basis..... when I told u years ago u years ago that certain machines r beatable,, u looked @ me like I was insane.... & said something 2 the effect that the low limit poker games u where playing were beatable ... slot machines r not....... So....... how's piker working out 4 u? ...... U stupid fuck!!.... Look @ u now!

    5 hours ago via mobile · Like..






    Sherry Bigcharles Mike please don't call him names. He has autism and does not deserve to be called names. People with autism make very poor choices










    Mike Romanos I must b retarded as well then.... trying 2 remember the last time I made a choice that wasn't very poor

    5 hours ago via mobile · Like..











    Jean BigCharles Cerenzie Tony you are a Canadian and you qualify for asch .check of 1800.00 per. month..

    4 hours ago · Like..











    Sherry Bigcharles Mike autism and retardation is 2 completely different things. People with autism sometimes are very brilliant in some things; but, sadly all people with autism have low common sense and they cannot help it. Tony is very brilliant in some things, like poker. When he was only 6 years old he was already putting together 1,000 piece adult puzzles. He was only two when he began to read. The mind is a strange thing. It is possible to be a genius in some areas of the mind and yet be almost retarded in common sense.

    3 hours ago · Like · 1..











    Mike Romanos Sounds like some I know... my bad.

    30 minutes ago via mobile · Like..











    Steve Lanzi Don't know if you know Tony, but Marx was one of the most anti-religious/anti-Christian persons who ever lived. He called religion "the opiate of the masses."

    22 minutes ago · Edited · Like

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  20. When panhandling is seen as the responsible choice, all hope is lost.

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    Replies
    1. i agree. when u have ppl in vegas offering u jobs and such. like a bus tix to kansas.

      Delete
  21. Jean BigCharles Cerenzie Tony you are a Canadian and you qualify for asch .check of 1800.00 per. month..

    4 hours ago · Like..



    Tony....This sounds like the motherlode. Head north young man.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. first id have to be approved for canadas ssi type program and im sure id be denied there too.

      Delete
    2. maybe mexico has a ssi program too. wtf. anything not to get a job.

      Delete
    3. Screw canadian ssi! Does your tribe in canada run a casino? If it does you should qualify for at least a half share monthly payment i would think...

      Delete
    4. or mayb cuba has a ssi program too. just a thought

      Delete
    5. Tony i can tell you right now that since you insist that you are white, you dont qualify for any native aid programs up here and probably wouldn't even get a tax exempt card.

      With a proper diagnosis, your disability would get you $1100 a month IF you were able to convince them that you were entirely incapable of working. You would also get low income housing FULL of minorities (Canada is far more multicultural than the US) and free healthcare. Panhandling when you lose your monthly nut is cold as hell though, and we usually expect some sort of service from our bums, like for instance a windshield cleaning at a red light.

      Delete
  22. Listen to your friends on here and go home to Kansas. best option

    But if you want to work in vegas. Here's something you can do:
    Become one of those missionaries on the strip. Something your good at. You get a uniform; you get to keep 20%, you get a free room. This company has a license to do business on the strip. check out the video. I don't agree with it, but its a free room and you can supplement your income

    www.nbcnews.com/video/dateline/52526634/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ive always considered those guys were hyprocrites since they dont give any of that money to a homeless person asking for help, (not realizing they were homeless themselves). how the hell does their employers know they arent keeping a lot of it for themselves?

      Delete
    2. Despite what you think Tony, 98% of the people, no matter race or economic conditions, are basically honest. That is why they don't take what they can. They're honest.

      Maybe there is a lesson in there for you.

      Delete
  23. You should go to Kansas.
    Ever consider becoming one of the missionaries on the Strip. They get a uniform, a free place to live, and get to keep 20% of what they collect. I don't agree with it, but it might be something you can do.
    www.nbcnews.com/video/dateline/52526634/

    ReplyDelete
  24. Tony, maybe you should get a job handing out those cards for the "girls to your door" places on the Vegas strip.

    I don't think Jesus would approve, but Karl Marx might.

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  25. Tony: Your posts have made it seem that your mother would slam the door in your face if you came home. Based on her posts above, that's obviously not the case. Go back to Kansas and ask her and anyone else there who still cares about you for help.

    ReplyDelete
  26. So, in your post above it states, From your Mother, that she has offered and told you time and time again to come home but you refuse.

    Yet, when other people tell you to go home you tell us you can't because your mother doesn't want you to be there and will make you pay rent.

    Sounds to me like she wants you to come home so she can help straighten you out from this nightmare you are living but you refuse to do it and make up excuses to not do it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. y go home ,sir. he is living the dream. sleeping outside.the endless search 4 power outlets.smelly socks.grinding seals(whatever the fuck that is) at dennys. i can see a reality series here

      Delete
  27. the whole issue with tips isnt about the size of yr bankroll but the size of the pot and/or the service and skill of the dealer. imo. if i am in 1-2 nl game in raise preflop and only get the blinds and/or 1 limper. sorry ,no tip. more so if they dont have a no flop no drop policy like some casinos. also, to me the skill of the dealer too. is the dealer controlling the game like annoucing raises or moving the action in a timely manner. for example, when i use to play in florida in the early 2000s. we played on the sun cruise casino cruises bcuz that was only place to place higher limit and no limit games.so the cruise was about 3 to 3 1/2 hours. during the day, we played limit 5-10 holdem or 5-10 round and round .which is 1 orbit hi/lo omaha 1 orbit limit. so basically the dealers and the players want a fast game bcuz the dealers only have that time to get tips and players that time to play or make money. so the dealer made great tips from us reg bcuz they would make sure blinds r up, always making sure the player knew it was his or her turn to act,etc,etc.so yr ideas on tipping r so weird to me. that is like going to applebees getting a meal for say 20 bucks but i only tip 50 cents bcuz i am poor or underemployed but mitt romney or chris rock gets the same meal he tips 200 bucks. u tip for the service and value of the meal like in poker. hope this makes sense. tc

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  28. Tonys mom is right and its to bad Tony wouldn't follow her advice and come home. She knows whats best for him. I believe his judgement is seriously clouded due to his autism.

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  29. Tony's view on communism is in line with his sense of entitlement that he wears like a badge. Tony wants what everyone else has, but despises the effort it takes to get it with a passion. People should just give it to him instead.

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  30. new roll $608, do not know for the life of me how i managed to miss low after low and lose over $100 in the game again. sitting in a 24 hour restaraunt but they will not let me sit here forever. seriously, i am getting too mad and the whole table could sense it and didnt like it, i think i should go back up north and play $20 NL, maybe even $40, or maybe stick to omaha and just hope for the best at least that way if i did win, its enough to grow the roll. floorman pretty much agreed with me on the side the rake might be unbeatable. how can $90 come off the table in $1-3 and others claim its my play why im not winning?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Because it isn't rake or skill. It's rake and skill that contribute to winrate. The rake sucks. The skill is low. Even if the rake was $0, you still might not win in that game, or any game for that matter.

      Delete
    2. SbrJuly 29, 2013 at 5:19 AM
      You have this flawed logic that you're losing EITHER because the rake is too high OR because you aren't skilled, and since you know the rake is too high, then you must be skilled.

      The truth is, you're losing at poker because the rake is too high AND you aren't skilled. If you have a larger bankroll and move up in stakes you alleviate the former problem, but exacerbate the latter. Your lack of skill at poker is the elephant in the room that you refuse to acknowledge.

      Delete
    3. its a conspiracy,sir. u r the greatest poker but the casinos and military industrial complex dont want u play poker 4 a living. right now, jesse ventura is on the case to bring this horrible injustice to light.here is what jesse learn that when u come into a casino .whatever table u r at the other poker players r secret govt cyborgs ,that r from area 51 like the terminator, and they r in collusion to take yr bankroll from u.the mission statement is to force u to get a job. in know, it is insane. i mean y should u have to get a job . when u play poker so well. what can i say .politics,man

      Delete
    4. The floorman probably doesn't want you there anymore because he is nervous that you are going to "lose it" mentally in the near future and cause a problem for him. So it's "yeah man the rake is proable to high for you, you should find somewhere else to play"

      Delete
    5. how can $90 come off the table in $1-3 and others claim its my play why im not winning?

      Because you're losing money? People who are good poker players and read people and situations well and exhibit patience and self control win money long term, rake or no rake. People who are there to simply gamble and freak out when they don't win - you complain of missing so many lows, shouldn't you be playing stud hi lo, not just stud half the pot?

      Delete
  31. So once again, another lie. You keep saying your mother doesn't want you at home, but you have now published a message saying that she not only does, but has asked you repeatedly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. theres other messages from mom on facebook suggesting theres no longer a waiting list at park place for public housing and she can get me in, which i dont believe at all. then she claims SRS in KS gives emergency assistance if i am homeless and u dont have to be a woman with kids to get it. and in the past she has always charged RENT, of course she will let me in while i have money, but when im broke im fucked. im not going there just to go broke giving her money periodically til im broke. i need to go to where i can GROW A BANKROLL. none of the readers understand this, they think shelter is my biggest need, its not its a way to take money in instead of put money out.

      Delete
    2. So your biggest need is to take money in?
      Your biggest solution is panhandling?
      It should be getting a part time job somewhere.

      Jobs provide a consistent way to take money in while not actually taking money away from you. Strange Shit

      Delete
    3. if u wouldnt offer me work, why should others do it and why should u think others will? and why is everyone posting HERE instead of in the new blog?

      Delete
    4. Tony

      Explain to me why you can't buy a bus ticket to KS....give your Mom $100 for rent and keep $100 in your pocket and put the rest on Bovada and grind the stud hi lo games there?

      You would:

      1. Have a room and a bed and a place to do laundry
      2. Be able to grind poker all day
      3. Have a way to make money...with low rake, no tips and soft opponents.
      4. Not have to deal with other people while you are gambling.

      After a month or so...you could start looking for your own place. The 1st withdrawal every month from Bovada is free.

      I don't get it...do you dislike living with your Mom and Son that much?

      Delete
    5. im too uncomfortable turning loose of any money, (its psychological) and i cant do it mentally. also i dont think thats enough to grind online, online games are much harder to beat. i certainly wouldnt be able to generate even $50 a week to cover costs while in KS. and the withdrawal process is too hard. at least on UP and seals i can get many frequent withdrawals immediately. im very afraid of mom throwing me out too, maybe while im waiting 2-3 weeks on that bovada check.

      Delete
  32. Tony you really are a sad individual. You hate anyone that is successful, but you are not willing to do one damn thing to make yourself successful. You hate everyone that does not look like you, yet you are of mixed races. Tony you hate our mother and your child, because they are of no use to you. You sir are a complete user of people and a burden on everyone that knows you. I have been a fan of yours for several years and have offer to help you in the past, but you don't want a helping hand up you want only hand outs. Go home get a freaking job, pay your elderly mother a few bucks rent, get to know your son. BE A MAN FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE!!!!!

    ReplyDelete