Sunday, April 28, 2013

Running out of moolah again

when i took my free room at the riviera for 3 nights, my roll was OVER $2000, after just winning $121 at the nugget in the NL game. and i wanted to play the $2-20 spread again because id won over $500 in it just the week before, which got me to over $1800 from $1300. at the time i thought it might be the solution to rebuilding the roll, especially if i got in enough hours to qualify for the freeroll in which even last place is guaranteed $200. and it would be a good promotion for a guy with a lot bigger roll.

but the problem is, every hand u get sucked out on, u lose a ton, and its a lot faster than $2-6 spread which im used to at sams and texas. texas station is trying to offer $2-10 spread also i found out
tonight, when Vince and i went there briefly after leaving the poker palace. and Herbie asked me a good question also. he asked me why when there were so many pool players in there playing horribly loose why i wanted to sit there and play nothing but Team5 regulars. i'd probably done better in the loose game, even though id probably get several hundred back maybe even closer to $1000 if i made the freeroll. But id need a lot more play. its just too expensive a game, with $7 a round in blinds if the mandatory straddle is in effect instead of $3 a round in blinds or $4.

so i blamed being in a casino thats never had my favorite games and never done well in unless grabbing a promotion. and decided to play elsewhere tonight, in a cheap game at the poker palace, start out buying in $40 with a SINGLE $2 BB, and then unlimited buyins, no cap. was hoping i might see Carmen there and find out why shes hardly blogging (1 entry in 2 months) and so quiet on facebook lately when she was so addicted to candy crush saga she was on it all day long. But no luck, she wasnt there. and then the game did not even go, after going for 24 hours yesterday and then breaking up just before tonights tourny. wish id known that, id came by at noon. they said id have better luck coming in on friday next week. also they moved the old shufflemaster VBJ out of there Vince and i used to play. still have the $1 table game BJ, i played 3 hours in it and lost $3.

Vince dropped out his friend across from Tx station at a condo unit thats gated i think, looks nice and he bought it outright for $25,000 only. seems cheap and he only pays $162 a month in some fee to live there. wish i could live that cheap or someone would get me set up in one and let me pay them back per month with a profit. thats a really nice safe place to live within walking distance of a good game, and the ONLY safe place in that neighborhood. in vegas, theres so much u can take advantage of with money, in the way of making money buying and selling real estate. the funny thing is, thats what Britni wanted to get involved in, but in detroit so she very well couldve died.

also them 2 books mom sent were really interesting, ive finished one and am halfway thru the 2nd lucky for me the print is big enough to see instead of the small print so common nowdays. at least online u can zoom in to 125% that makes it easy. and being around a very bright light helps too.

i dont know if its a good thing or a bad thing most all of the drop from $2000 was on poker and not machines, dont say much for my poker game, but its like ive always said, u run really bad when stressed about the money but not when u have plenty of money, or are using someone elses money, which is why i could use some stakes. and im plenty dead tired, been up a lot of hours now and im an old man. so goodnight.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Two Choices

got 2 choices of how i want to live my life, one choice is to go back to Jean, relax and take it easy playing online seals with clubs, a little VBJ, and not have to stress over rent and commutes and i think now with a roll of $1993 i might have enough. the other choice is to find a place in vegas that dont involve commuting close to a NL game.

and ive got 3 days to decide for that is when my room here at this casino is now up. yes, i know my rent has been due on Tuesdays. today i officially moved out of a place on boulder hwy, and i got 2 nights at this one hotel downtown. I really miss my old longterm setups in the casino, made life so convenient and stress free, hate riding buses and waiting at busstops after dark. i had to move out of that place on boulder hwy for a reason no one reading this blog could know before now. u see a certain dealer at Hooters knew exactly where i lived, and what unit number my apt was. u see he gave me a lift over there and helped me carry my things when i first moved in.

and all the threats and the posts trying to find out where i was living was making me uncomfortable, especially since this dealer knew exactly which unit number it was besides just knowing the apt complex. So now i feel a lot better, because now no one will ever know where im living. i have a nice bed and TV now in this casino hotel room.

and about Ray--he is one of the guys about my age from the old monte carlo casino festivals in toledo when i lived there age 19-23. learned how to play poker then. am surprised to hear he learned of my blog, Larry was the old man i played chess with all the time. and sometimes Ray drove me home. neither one of us are gay. dont know why anyone would get that idea. for a while he was driving a greyhound bus and sometimes came into vegas. no idea what became of that job. He was the one who taught me how to stack the deal when im dealing. a skill still known by a lot of old time stud dealers in this town.

i am not sure what ill do once my 3 days are up, guess it depends on how im doing in the NL games. i know when im in Jean it keeps me off the VP machines, but i dont want to be where i can play no poker at all except for online, maybe it will just be a weeks vacation. still would like to live elsewhere instead of vegas too. that way no one would ever know where i am.

ssi finally sent the denial letter to vince, so i need to go file an appeal. also my mother sent down a lot of old paperwork that helped me get ssi in ks, and the name of my old atty, who seems to not have a NV license and no longer be in business. once i get a steady address i still can really use reading glasses and i still will have a great need for a microwave soon, but right now id need it stored for me so its too soon to get one. ill spend the next 2 days playing my best at $1-2 NL to see how i do buying in from $100 to $200 at a time in a good game. and getting in touch with SSI, and i might need to go in person to appeal so i can give them all these papers mom sent me, is anyone such as seattle irish or pokerjohnny willing to hang out in an SSI office for a while with me? also might need a ride out to Jean thurs, will throw in something on the gas.

my play is so split up i dont qualify for ANY freerolls, not sams town, or EC, and is one of the reasons i hate them type of promos in the first place instead of AA cracked. u see i dont want to make a weeklong or monthlong commitment to any one room. same way with the riviera promotions in the spread limit game that i did exceptionally well in, cashing out over $500 when in the game for $138. might go there if that game went more days a week, and this summer they will be offering free rooms for hours played during the week and $45 weekend rooms, so i might try and stay there for the 28 day max soon but that is quite a ways off yet. it wont start for over another month.

also tmobile promised me theyd turn my service on for $40.35 and that was all i authorized to pay, and it seems like somehow they charged me $50 more and took the money out of my bank, so now i need to call them about that too. not sure whats going on. i dont see the $50 on my bank statement yet, but it shows 2 charges being paid on the 22nd of april, not sure what the extra $50 is. not really any way to get it back considering its money i owed. not sure why its seperate too, looks like it was put on a credit card ending in 904, i dont have a credit card ending in 904. at least not on my current one, cant remember the old one, it might get reversed and my bank charge me and them, better call them soon and ssi soon.

so is anyone else coming into vegas very soon? also i dread mentioning my next monthly internet bill and my  $14 bank service fee will also both be coming within the week. ill never feel like im finally starting to get back on my feet til i pass $3000 again, its been many months since ive had $3000. i posted earlier on twitter $2043, but that was before i saw the other $50 subtraction from tmobile.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

new roll, $2018. now i dont know if thats a good thing or a bad thing, considering last night the roll once briefly reached $2233 as i was eating in the cafe at the nugget. (right before i left the game to eat.) that was what i quit with.

also, im afraid to spend money on anything i need to pay, including rent, internet, and phone, because i feel  ill need to hold onto it to have enough to play NL with instead.

Grouchie sent me a message on twitter last night, wanting to know where id be playing so i told him the golden nugget. but it didnt see it til hours later. later he sent a text he was at the MGM, and i didnt see that til another 6 hours later, is why i need a working phone or a room with wifi at the table. also i knew omerta was in town, id assume hes playing in the game with mc gee somewhere.

so id been winning heavily at the nugget all night, buying in $100 and eventually cashing out $447. after id built my stack up somewhat, some new guy sat down in the 2 seat, a young drunk. couldnt tell if he was hispanic or egyptian, thought it might be tarbash or omerta. although at first i thought omerta was a troll account created by mc gee. anyway he was playing really loose, donked off about $500 to the same young girl in seat 4. another woman from canada with her husband who has avp installed on her phone was in seat 7. i was in seat 9. and the guy in the one seat must of known of my blog though he claimed he didnt because when i was talking, he said at least u keep ur blog updated. then later backtracked and said thats what he is assuming. and the guy in seat 3 often said hes mistaken for sklansky and was a regular who plays lots of 20-40 limit elsewhere and 40-80.

so i get a hand AQ, and seat 2 bets $15, but this was about the time he first sat. before hed lost so much. i mean he bets this after the flop, cannot remember what happened preflop. i mightve been the small blind on a limped pot. flop comes up A29 rainbow, and he bets the $15 as i said. the woman with far less chips than me, about $130 maybe less, makes it $30. i really dont know what to do, i call. then seat 2 raises $65 more, and she goes allin. and i fold. turns out he had A9 and she had A5. so i made a good fold, but it came runner runner TT, makes me the winner had i stayed. i was sick about it, and he said i was a nigger and a MF for being afraid to call him. thats another reason i assumed it might be one of those guys. dealer said to calm down and not use those words, but the floor never came over.

he later went broke in short order, giving so much to the asian woman in seat 4, also a little bit loose.

his final hand he had something like J9 clubs and bets $45 into a $3 pot preflop. 2 people call, including the woman in seat 7. i have a ton of chips, and have no choice but to shove KK and take down all the dead money, was so relieved no one had AA. how likely would that have been in ur opinion? both them folded after i shoved $300+, including the guy who first called who had a lot of chips.

shortly after he quit i left to eat, giving back about $25 first. it was AFTER i came back from eating and rebought $100 at a new table things went bad. i lost the $100 on JJ after a guy overbetting way too much preflop bets $20, hes raised 4 of the last 6 hands, is a tourist. asian guy whose moved tables a lot calls, and i think he might be a reg, but one who plays in other rooms, not the nugget. i shoved my last $80-90 and everyone folds but the asian, who has AA. same situation, just this time im out. so i left.

and im wasting too much time online--this updating is work--like a real job, no wonder ive put it off. would talk more but no time.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Long overdue update, and probably my last blog entry, ill be broke within the week

after the week is up, when i am way too broke to pay another week or stay longer in vegas, i'll probably end up going back to Jean, but certainly not to play the machine, just to have a free room for about 9 days worth of my final $132 in comps while i grind on seals with clubs all week. got about 900 chips there now, and i wonder if the price of bitcoins will ever come back, or if it will drop to under $5. Bitcoin has too many competitors for it to ever work. the US govt and its hackers could bring it to a screeching halt overnight anytime it becomes too strong.

Spent the day moving out of my apt before noon, and need to go back to sleep. I have always preferred sleeping days anyway instead of nights, i dont like lying in an address i dont feel safe at at night. best time to play poker is from 6pm on, and the best time to sleep is from like 8am to 4pm, or maybe a little bit earlier. So i need to work on changing my schedule. now no one will have any idea of where im living, and everything will be a short commute and i wont need to ride any buses unless i want to go out to the strip or elsewhere. and this has as least some security in the area unlike boulder highway. also, ill not be on the ground floor anymore, although im paying a bit more a week in rent now. so my new bankroll is down to only $933. im very worried.

and also, even though i dont really have any money for it at all, going to try and play just NL mostly or maybe omaha8 for the full week. If i get in a game where i have a chance to win something, it will keep me from getting frustrated and going on tilt, and playing a machine. something where i can beat the rake so i dont give up all hope and start to play bad. not needing to use buses anymore might help me avoid tilt, thats the part of the day i hated the most when commuting to hooters from the cannery. also if i can easily walk home, it will help me avoid playing way too long when overly tired but stuck. also leaving this full 900 chips on seals will help too with that. ill feel like ive got enough to work with.

and if i increase the roll enough to where i can afford to live by a game omaha8 game, ill move again to find a cheaper place. i want to try NL for a week first, but am very scared. maybe ill end up back in Jean. i do feel like seals with clubs is beatable even with all the cheating.

if i did end up back in Jean id make very small bets if i ran out of room comps. 600 $2 bets, or 300 $4 bets will cover the room. the theorteical cost of this is only about $40 a week, far less than what im paying elsewhere in cash. (with flat betting small amounts no counting). to speed it up play multiple spots. (greatly reduce hours needed). and keep the bets small so i dont get crushed if unlucky. i think this way the worst id do is drop $100, and could still win that if i was really lucky.

though i say ill play NL, if i drop below $700,  which could happen fast, ill just play Omaha8 and commute by bus after all i still seriously could use some stakes, and ive got a plan to do the right thing and stay off machines, so i think i deserve them, since ive won for the last staker.
my cell phone was suspended several days back, It was a big err on my part not to call them when i was supposed to be doing that every 10 days and making a payment to keep my service. finally got around to calling them today, even though i knew i couldnt give them near enough to turn it back on, and as i suspected $20 wasnt enough. so that means they will get nothing, and ill never have service again, and end up with a $500 plus bill counting the early termination fee on my credit report.

what was bugging me was all the phone calls that kept coming in that it wouldnt allow me to answer, just silence if i did. and all the incoming text messages i couldnt reply to. i asked the phone company about that today and they said the reason i was getting those was it was only suspended temporarily while they waited for me to make contact instead of permanently. But today they said now within the next few hours or day it would be suspended permanently since i didnt make payment or payment arrangements.

I got tired of friends thinking i was probably lying about having my phone shut off. Mc gee was particularly bad about this, he never once answered back any emails id sent not even to see kingofdonks while he was here, but he did send texts and calls, why i dont know since he knows i cannot reach him at his phone, and dont think thats his main email or ever checks that email, really need to reach him online privately but no idea how. so i called mainly to complain and ask them to shut off the number totally if they wouldnt reistall service for $20.

also AK gal told me Turd Ferguson is in town and would like to see me. i also need to see tatude at the hard rock too. will take a nap then see about getting out that way. if i hear back from tatude or AK gal in email or twitter.

to me a pizza turner is what u call the thing u pick up the pizza with and set it on the plate. I'd like to know what u guys are calling it.

yeah this blog entry is depressing, considering that i was briefly over $1700 the last time i posted a blog entry. Im back to where i was now before i won that money for kingofdonks. and though most of it was lost at poker this time, still a small portion was lost on machines. the good news is i can think of at least two things i avoided sitting at one when normally i wouldve.

theres more i could tell, but my closest friends advised that i shouldnt. also it was recommended i stop posting on roughing the punter and stick to my blog, so i think i will for the most part.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

well as usual, most of the readers were right, and i was wrong

about the fact i should be playing NL that is. won over $250 at hooters today, and left. might play more later, and need to do a few things at walmarts too, and also it might be a good idea to pay my rent early. maybe ive just been lucky, but winning at NL is certainly a lot easier than winning at $2 4. and i won it thru good play, never did get aces cracked once.

and they mightve also been right about me needing to remove those old bans, for i did my best playing on the strip the other day. i'm just glad Vegas has so many poker rooms theyre still some great rooms im not banned. most of todays winnings came from AK on a flop of AAT. also theres so many great poker rooms outside of vegas id like to go to, getting really sick of vegas, i think the games and choices of games are far better elsewhere.

got a big grocery list of stuff i need. won't do it yet, but how can i be sure a used microwave would work, and the much bigger fear, when i  cant pay rent anymore, who would store it this time?
this was typed a few hours earlier today on the city bus. am home for a little while now, Bought a few things i need at walmarts, such as milk, but what i really need is a water pitcher. and a glass. stuck some frozen pizzas and ice cream away, and bought some fruit and i eat healthily, i also bought some carrots. and i never buy pop either. Ended up the day with a roll of $1712. and ill be glad once the hairs get out from under the skin in my fingers, got 2 that are really bugging me. also played poker elsewhere on the way home and won quite a bit more. didnt spend much at walmarts, more concerned about paying the rent, and would like to do something about my phone. want to also transfer to the other apt community closer to where i plan to be using the bus more. Wanted to check out the poker palace weekend game too, but just never got around to doing it.

if i stick around vegas instead of returning to Jean, i need a lot more silverware, and dishes, did buy detergent today. down to only 1 spoon and thats the total of my silverware, except for a noodle soup spoon. and a pizza turner. i really hate the commutes back and forth to the casino instead of all the old days of just living inside the casino, wish i still had my setup at the 4 queens that was so convenient. i cant find anything cheap enough in the casino, weekends are jacked up way too much. if i move again, i really need a 2nd large container very big in size, carrying so many bags along with one small blue suitcase just doesnt work.

amazing how many people would rather pay $960 a year more in rent than get some cheap used furniture. Not that i would do it, but still. even spending $30 on a secondhand microwave is a lot to me. $1712 may be a vast improvement to the $700 i had before kingofdonks helped to select me a decent place to live, convenient to the busses. But thats still NOTHING for a bankroll, certainly not with living expenses included too. id only have 8 of his $200 buyins at the V (which is why im not playing there buying in $200 despite my success record).

Wec too was right when he suggested my game really improved once i started making bigger size buyins last 2 years. although when i buy too much, then my game deteriorates. i think about $200 is best. Even the black pimp was right when he talks about how much my roll was wasted foolishly. but theres nothing i can do about that now. i can only make the right decisions moving forward. Which i did today, i didnt go by this one VBJ game with a bad payout up the street. i didnt even walk in the casino at all. other times in my life i probably wouldve. But im hating myself terribly for putting myself into this mess, and really feel like this is my FINAL chance to make it from poker alone, if i dont want to lose it all and be sleeping outside daily. i cant come back forever, or get staked forever, no matter how good of an investment i am. but at least im honest. that really is the main reason people invest in me instead of others.

Friday, April 12, 2013

me and kingofdonks playing hooters right now as i type from laptop, and also a big thanks to pokerJohnny who washed my laundry and brought it by

would like to post some hand histories from yesterdays session at the Venetian with kingofdonks. i ran his $200 stake into $767 and he let me keep far more of it than $283.50 like some stakers wouldve.

my only mistakes were trying to bluff 3 hands, only 1 of which was successful, and it mightve not even been a bluff.

the most important 3 hands i can remember were as follows. one hand i had 78 diamonds, and i was down at the time after having over $100 more earlier and being $65 up. 4 of us called a raise to $15 preflop. flop comes 10 7 3 with 2 clubs, and i call a bet of $25 since everyone else was folding. turn comes 8 of clubs, putting the 3 flush on the board. he bets $30 again, and i shoved allin putting him on AA with nut flush draw. turns out thats exactly his hand, and my 2 pair held up, there was a lot of ways it couldve lost on the river, so i was relieved. so my stack was now close to $400.

almost before i got the chips stacked i get dealt TJ suited, and again call a guy who raises his straddle. i am not sure but think the raise was to $20. this guy was losing heavily and was on tilt. flop comes up T84 and he bets $35, i call, and everyone else folds but one guy without more than about $80-100 left. turn comes 2 diamonds, complete blank. guy checks whose on tilt, i bet $45 into a pot of well over $100, and guy behinds me folds, and said later he knew id call if he shoves. and then i get incredibly lucky, the original better, who im afraid of, folds also. after this hand i get my chips counted and im up to $540. i feel good about playing NL again and realize how much easier it is to play when its not your own money, for i won the day before with his money also.

king of donks eventually joins my table. and of course i cant remember many hands by now, and 0 from day 1. but i do remember one in which i called with 65 spades to see the flop, cannot remember if it was raised. flop comes 662 rainbow and i check, and a guy with KK bets $20, one guy calls, and i call. turn comes J, and we both check, and the same guy with not more than $125 in chips bets another $40. we both call, and i begin to worry about my kicker. no flush or straight draws, so im not playing aggressively. river comes 5, giving me the boat and i know i have to be good. guy checks who i suspect of having a six in his hand, but not sure. i check, because the guy behind me has so few chips i fully expect him to go allin, and that was a terrible mistake on my part. he turns over his KK and checks, other guy has 6Q, and i missed a lot of value. i was expecting the KK to bet, the other guy to call or raise, and be committed for a monster pot (he had at least $300 behind) when i shoved allin. so how would u have played the river differently?

mc gee never showed up today, kingofdonks went to catch his plane, and the game broke up too short and we are waiting for enough to start it back up its 3.40 and aa cracked goes til 7pm. im currently at $119 of my $50 buyin. and ive got these 4 bags from Johnny ive got to bring over to my room on boulder hwy. at least ive got a ton of clean clothes, 1 pan, and my nail clippers again. also mom sent some ssi paperwork and 2 books. but it wont arrive til thrus, thats why i need to renew my rent tues morning. the whole purpose of reducing the rental price to $154 from $174 is to make sure i dont lose it.

am so lucky kingofdonks came into town, him and Andy saved my life, now i might be able to recover and stay indoors and get back into poker instead of having to play other games. i now have 30 buyins of $40 again. also im disappointed how much bitcoin has dropped on seals, but the new lower blinds on some games there are nice. and also i wish id not lost Josies glasses, its getting much harder on me to see small print. thats why i cant post blog entries from cell, and cant play on seals from my cell. mom couldnt put the glasses in the package with the papers cause she got the book rate. it did include 2 books shed accidently bought twice.

also not only is it alot easier to win while on a stake for someone else than ur own money, i think $200 buyins, (and better casinos such as venetian) probably helps u win also. i could do really well if i had as little as a $4000 roll again, i think i need to find a way to start getting more stakes. that way people will see me making them money instead of just giving me gifts.

would be curious what the minimum bankroll is most readers think that i could survive on, and make it just playing nothing but poker. also im wondering if theres any readers other than Stump who think playing $2-4 is what i should be playing, also maybe $2-6 spread. still think hooters, and maybe suncoast omaha game are worth playing, and i dont know about the V and orleans omaha8 games, because the blinds are a lot more in those games. samstown the omaha8 only goes thrus, pretty good game, only $1-3 blinds.

online poker is still an option but it seems i should open an intertops acct to have the sngs actually running for 10 max DON, and vook says they dont take new US players.

realizing i have more friends than i thought i do, and feel so bad about mc gee. i was wrong. and johnny and kingofdonks were really helpful. even Josie and lightning are still around.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

socializing (and playing poker for a living) is especially hard when under pressure

Mc Gee posted this earlier in roughing the punter, and my version of it is somewhat different.
Well folks we can add another fine establishment that Mr. Bigcharles will no longer be welcomed at anymore. Terrible's has just issued a 30 day ban against him for his behavior this evening.

We were playing 2-4 limit which I made a rare exception to play after his constant nagging of wanting to see how I would do in the game. He then won an early pot and being the cocky SOB that he is challenged me to see who would have the most profit by midnight. I laughed it off explaining that doing such would not prove anything.

After a few hours of playing vastly different styles, we found ourselves both up $105. Tony was on a mini-upswing and I the opposite. His arrogance and boisterous voice consumed the air waves progressively getting louder. I then won a major pot and never looked back, up $160ish. Tony then started to "give back his win" as he calls it and was only up $60 in the game. It was to be his BB the next hand.

{Tony had played video poker earlier in the day losing $57.}

Anger consumed him, and he jumped out of his chair and started yelling, "Give ME your KEYS!" and then I replied "No." He got even louder and started pointing, "GIVE ME YOUR KEYS!!" I said, "No. chill out" Tony then yelled. "I CAN'T STAY HERE, I HAVE NOOOO ROOM, GIVE ME YOUR FUCKKKKING KEYS!!!" I said, "No."

Tony, then SHOVED my 260 blue chips all over the place, across the table, into 2 other players' stacks, into the dealer tray, and the floor.

He is lucky I didn't chose to knock his head off.

Multiple security guards and the poker manager discussed the situation with me afterwards. Security wanted to perma-ban you Tony, but I told them that I knew him and that he were going through a tough time. Somehow, even after being a victim of his psychopathic outburst, I stopped it from escalating to a perma-ban against Tony.

Then after leaving the property he sends me a text stating that I could have told them (poker management) that I wasn't offended.

No apology. No responsibility for his actions. More TBC bullshit about how I shouldn't have been offended.

You're a prick TBC.

Enjoy sleeping at the airport and never touch my chips again asshole.

now before i touch on all this and give my view of why this happened, let me first give a big thanks to King of Donks for all the help he has been, kind of like Andy was. First it was the $50 on lock, 2nd it was paying $115 of my past due internet, 3rd it was offering a tourny stake i figured id better play some other time when i could play my best for him so people wouldnt think i wasnt at my sharpest when playing a stake, and 4th it was offering to pay for a week in vegas in one of these weekly rental places to get me setup without being stressed about not having a room while i try to play poker for a week. Since he offered to pay in the morning, and i couldnt get into a room tonight for $25 at samstown i thought my calender would allow, i went and took a week elsewhere and am good until noon tuesday. cost me $154 for a week, and is 100% unfurnished. no bed, no table, no toilet paper, no towels, no table, no chairs, no tv, no couch, i took it because it saved him a little from what id originally intended for the week, and also saves ME money too if i want to keep the room and renew it on future weeks, and i think thats way too high for me to pay, certainly couldnt pay more. so i cut the weekly cost as much as i could. and now i need a sheet and pillow again. at least pokerJohnny can get rid of holding those bags for me now. was too dead tired to stay awake much longer, will sleep immediately once done with this blog post and was hoping to finish it before kingofdonks woke up.
still totally unsure of where to play, but i did find out about a promotion at a different casino that should be very easy to do, problem is the rake is pretty hefty there for such a small game but id gather the promotions worth a few hundred weekly. not even counting the freeroll. also am considering other places with lower blinds i am afraid to risk anything unless i am staked for cash games too. i did promise kingofdonks i wouldnt play anymore machines this week.
u see i didnt mention this in my last post but i didnt drop entirely to the $700s from the $900s at $2-4 before todays $57 VP loss at terribles i dropped over $80 a couple days earlier too. i am quite ashamed of myself and i really wish i could control myself without needing counseling. i dont really see how i can be so ignorant and so dumb. i want people to know this, i dont want them thinking im losing all that at $2-4. i actually dont think ill win or lose much over the rake longrun. Mc Gee was winning way over the rake not sure how.
good news is i am back to $824 (before i paid the $154 kingofdonks is reimbursing me via moneygram). of course, thats still nowhere near enough to hang out in vegas and play poker, also i deposited the money i bought on coinbase thats now doubled in price in the last week into seals, so i now have 120 chips there to try and grind. bitcoin is up to about $200 i think.
----and now for Mc Gee and terribles---
i was quite angry with myself about the time Mc Gee first came, for not waiting til 1pm to leave the room, although the maid was bugging me and i had a late 1pm checkout, the plan was to stay in there til poker opened at 1pm so id not get bored. i left the room about 12.30 since mc Gee and i were thinking of going to hooters, and i had the agreement from him he would chop this time. (last time i felt like he was trying to take advantage of me since he thinks hes better, and selectively chops). an old guy got angry with him for this, and left pissed.
anyway i sat at a VP, the same one id both lost about $100 on the other day, and won back about $20 on 12 hours later. started doing absolutely horrible, and by 1pm, was out $57 and totally hating myself. Mc Gee showed up right as 4 of us were getting ready to open the table, and i convinced him to sit because i was curious to see how he would do and i thought he might change his mind and consider this game beatable. i was surprised and pleased he was willing to sit.
we both started off winning, and never were doing too badly. and eventually we got to where we were both up $105. i get a bit offended Mc Gee dont respect my game of poker and puts me down and considers himself a better player. (because he plays very loose, such as calling AT in EP in a 10 handed game of limit). In NL that call isnt near as loose because u can see so many more flops same with 55 etc which he also says im dumb to fold in limit. i wanted him to stay originally til midnight, so i can still be winning (with him seeing) and then maybe he would respect my play more. Plus i fully expected to be up more by then than him.
a new dealer came, and dealt me a pot with Mc Gee away from the table, and i was at a new high of $206 out of the $86 id sat with after dropping $57 of the $143 cash in VP. i seriously was planning to quit and renew my room that i checked out of earlier and take a break once i hit $232 so i could still have $200. i could tell the dealer was pissed i didnt tip and i felt she was rude, and that effected my play. i get sick and tired of being treated rudely, mostly by waitresses just cause im so desperate and broke. i dont see why people who are loaded (such as tipped employees) are rude to those without money, when the only people u should be resentful of and rude to are those with more money than u. But never to someone poorer, those are the people God says to care for. which is why i did for Britni and Lorna. But dont feel any sympathy for those with jobs who are better off than me by far.
anyway i never won a pot the rest of her down, lost quite heavily during it, about $40 more and felt she was quite happy i lost, lost with many big hands, AK AQ suited, etc. right after Mc Gee returned. then when the new dealer came in i continued to lose and i wanted a break because i was tired since i woke up early at 9am and couldnt get back to sleep. due to scary dreams of demons stomping on Jesus Christ, dressed up in cartoon costumes, and making a u tube video of a false prophecy in front of a big audience and only i knew the truth as to what was going on. the whole audience was being decieved.
i told mc Gee i wanted to leave and suggested we go to arizona charlies since he told me about a good game there the other day, and thought he would be glad to play NL instead and was surprised he didnt want to get up. then i asked if i could have the keys because i needed somewhere to take a break and hes let me nap in his car before and theres no place in terribles to sit and use the laptop. theres no lobby, just the casino and u cant use it on the casino floor and i didnt feel like buying food in the cafe. was surprised he said no, and i tried to ask him if i could talk to him away from the table a minute because i just didnt feel like playing and couldnt understand why he wouldnt leave the seat to talk to me a minute and i said in no way was i going to post my BB. i felt like id sat far too long, and wanted to do the right thing for once (being to quit instantly since i was on tilt).
i felt like Mc Gees reason for not quitting was solely to take advatange of my tilt, and NOT the other players which he should be targeting being my friend, and i get annoyed when ive felt at times he solely cares about seeing me lose and not the other players and i dont feel like thats what a friend does. the same way at hooters before when he wouldnt chop good hands with me. and i knew i had to leave and find somewhere to hide and sleep or rest immediately and i didnt want to leave without talking to him privately first. if i was talking loud i never realize im talking loud, but i was irritatated id gave back all my days profits, and that id still had a profit had i not played VP first. i thought he was just trying to get my goat by not leaving the table to consult privately with me so i wouldnt have to talk in front of the whole table. plus all the dealers were annoyed at me for never being able to tip all 4 days. if i had of course, my roll wouldve been at least $50 less than it is now. and id be far more off and more stressed.
actually i didnt think Mc Gee would be offended i knocked the chips over, and i didnt really intend to knock them over nearly as hard as i did. i figured hed just tell me to relax and restack them and write it off due to frustration. i had a friend knock my stack over before and the dealer didnt make a scene at that casino. had i been tipping i dont think she wouldve went off yelling for the floor. sure i was in the wrong, but wasnt thinking clearly out of anger. what really offended me was the floorman saying that next time id probably hit someone instead of just the chips of course not, ive never done that. and most others for far worse altercations they only throw out for the day, but they hate me because im not tipping. sickcall mg gee really tips far more than he claimed to me too. ive seen it. also i dont think they realized we were together, it would be far worse and id never done it to someone i didnt know and trust. i trusted McGee to not be offended by it, and i guess i was wrong. i expected him to realize i was just angry and feeling like he cared NOTHING about my feelings, which irritated me at him in return, and i felt i was being goaded by him into continuing to play by his refusal to leave the table to talk to me a minute, or to get up with me to the car and then return. i dont really think i just yelled for the keys. mainly what i wanted was to talk away from the table. i get upset when people try to force me to talk about my problems in front of people instead of going off to the side to talk.
and i told mc gee id went to the airport to sleep, but actually i was elsewhere playing poker, i just didnt want to talk at the time, wanted to update blog first and give afew hours time in between. also i did try to call repeatedly immediately after the fact but he didn t answer the phone then.
sometimes i dont know how to take mc gee, he was too chummy with the guy omerta got ripped off by,  think maybe a few of those troll accounts are really his, and also too chummy with the guy who sent the piss. yet hes trustworthy driving me places and really seemed he wanted to help me regrow the roll. its just sometimes i get the feeling he specificaly loves seeing me lose at the tables and puts my play down so much i get offended.
and im too tired to type more and still need to talk to kingofdonks more and Pker johnny

Sunday, April 7, 2013

will update soon, once i have a room

(copied from roughing the punter).

roll $755. had only 3 short naps, one in Mc gees car, the other 2 in various closets in the convention center of a large casino, and was never found without being able to slip out on my own. dont really have enough money to play anything, am losing slowly at $2-4 but still think im playing well. lesters nugget idea was a very bad no action game, so i went elsewhere. am waiting to check into my free room today, and i had no way to plug in my laptop and sit online earlier. and was too tired

also was too tired to play the tourny kingofdonks suggested, want to wait til im in a room, and have a good long rest, mcgee said i was being responsible by waiting to set up the stake some other time instead when well rested.

think i shouldve stayed in Jean.

also turned down a free meal with a girl named Monica who once dated Jamie Gold, who knows of lots of online blogs. because of the asian guy whod also be around who didnt like me, i was afraid i was being setup in some way because he knew i had over $300 in cash on me, and id had to rode in a limo with them. at first id have sworn this woman was really Prudence, she also said she once worked at the rio, possibly as a bartender? now she has a lot of money, but didnt really have a source of income, just plays a lot of poker

will update more when i have a room, and sleep--and the blog too of course

also had a weird dream involving lightning making me have gay sex with some mexican guy from prison in a 3 way. hope they allow me to check in before 1pm, i seriously doubt it.

phones been dead, along with the laptop most of the time, no clothes but these 2 tshrits and no place to put anything, so cant get from Johnny. i dont know what to play, but know now is the time to sleep, not play, and i hope kingofdonks appreciates me not playing when i knew id not be at my best and wanting to put it off for a later time. roll is $755, at one point after leaving Jean i was up to $979.

and im sure this will be my last room. i think i should return to Jean and grind online, or take a room for a week and put 100% of the remaining roll into whatever wec suggests probaby BCP. of course now im too broke to do anything, including relocating.

even if i cant beat the rake playing $2-4 i think i should at least be breaking even, or not losing more than the rake

Monday, April 1, 2013

a strange dream

guys, make sure u dont miss the previous blog post. usually posts get over 1400 views and thats for 3-4 days between posts. this post prior has only been up for 1 day, and thats why it has less than 700 views, and also has less comments.  i have a problem i fear with posts being overlooked if i make 2 posts in too quick of succession.

that being said, i just woke up about 15 min ago and feel i need to mention this odd dream before i go to work. I dont know why i was feeling tired and taking a 3-4 hour nap between 6and 10pm, its just i never felt id slept enough earlier because i wanted to make sure the maid came in today so i got up right after hearing a knock on the door at 1.20pm. and after winning $14 earlier on the VBJ i wasnt in that big of a hurry to go back out and turn it into a loss again.

Anyway in this dream, im in a casino on the 2nd floor of an abandoned church. u have to go thru long dark hallways to get to the upstairs. the casino is composed of a few small pinball machines and of course the VBJ. im watching the guy next to me play who seems quite angry with me, and it becomes clear hes counting the cards, and im guessing he knows me, looks familiar. hes betting a wide spread, and im suddenly on to the fact hes also counting. then he disappears and some young black girl sits down. we got into some kind of arguement, (have forgotten now what about) and all of a sudden a black guy shows up with a knife. he tells me that its his sister, and that im disrespecting her. he throws me a knife also, and tells me to fight him like a man. 2 little kids bring the knife to me thats wrapped around a pair of hair scissors. i tell him i had no idea id offended her and was explaining to her my system and why i was playing so weirdly. (counting and sitting out always looks weird to those who are uninformed). anyway the man starts crying, gives me a hug, introduces himself as dugglebogey and says that no one in his life has ever apologized to him before and thats why hes so hard and been in prison so much. i dream the 2 kids are his.

so the dream changes, and im back downstairs in the church, long hallways and no one really in here. im looking to talk to the pastor, and then i see his 2 kids and theyre about 10 yrs older this time. (about 18 in age)  im wondering why theyre both still here. i'm getting ready to leave the church, and all of a sudden a motorcycle gang called the MONKEYS (i doubt there really is a group named that) thats known for lots of violence is all coming  down a huge elevated walkway all dressed up in masks like real monkeys. i dream the daughter of this guy called them, to teach me a lesson.

Then i dream the girl grabs my ass, and feels bad, and tells me to not say anything and to come with her, and pretends that i'm her boyfriend, so they wont think im the one theyre after. and we start going past the group on a different moving walkway on the other side. the dream changes and the monkeys are gone, and we are walking thru a rice paddy in north korea,, which by the way is being watched for nuclear launches right now by the US govt for an EMP attack possibly coming from their space station. and i wake up

and now im starving to death sick of soups, and the buffets put away and i cant really afford to be buying food anyway here with comps, i definitely need some solution but i dont know what it is. the only thing keeping me here is the free housing, if i left id no longer have a place to live and no one as old as me will sleep outside if they dont have to. except for a few winos and druggies.